Early Communication Problems 101

Early communication problems tend to bring about lots of problems that are latent if they are to be dragged on. For instance, most of the people tend to be resentful and revengeful, thus, they will remember the trouble you brought upon them and how you “spoilt” their plans. If the misunderstanding is not cleared up, it could tag on to both parties where ever they go. The next time they work with one another, they will begin every conversations with an intense hatred for one another. As a result, they will be adamant to every single suggestions proposed by that party. Such a scenario could have insidious damage to both of them in the long run.

Usually, misunderstanding is a by product of early communication problems, as no one is willing to clear things up. This is then dragged on and further exacerbated by accusations, sprouting from office gossips and conjectures, or even the filing of lawsuits against one another, as they begin to feel threatened by the momentary silence of another party.

But all is not lost if both parties change their perceptions, their paradigms. If they act out of volition in the settling of the perplexing issues troubling them, the matter will be easily resolved. However, this is easier said than done. It takes an immense amount of courage and a strong character to confront one another. We are often too timid in nature. This in turn causes us to resort to backstabbing and relentless badmouthing about one another.

Conversely, if we brave ourselves up, we can actually resolve the issues step by step. First, we pen down our deepest concerns of the highest priority, then we pen down the other party's concerns based on our understanding. For example, I may feel that he is just trying to exploit my company by dragging the payments, but in actual fact, he could have been waiting for the payment from another completed project of his, which is why he has to stall the payment period.

 

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This stage allows both parties to clear up any misunderstanding by identifying each others' concerns. At the same time, you could even help another party identify an even deeper concern of theirs. This is because, based on our human nature, we tend to put the urgent matters, rather than the important matters, as our priority. We want this to be done immediately because it is urgent, but deep inside us, we really don't mind if it is accounted for later on. Therefore, with astute analysis of our concerns, we will, in the process identify our genuine concerns. Debating gives us deeper insights as to what we really want to achieve out of the project or discussion.

Through these constant exchanges with the intent of a Win/Win proposition, both parties will begin to open up with a severe reduction in skepticism towards one another. As the tension ease, a sense of excitement sets in slowly and both parties will be exhilarated to continue on discussing. They will start to see each other's concerns from a new point of view with no biasness. Also, early misunderstanding will be cleared up, eliminating early communication problems simultaneously.

After all these tedious processes, both parties will then finally settle down to discuss the project right from the start. But this time round, both approaches the problems identified with a Win/Win proposition and both parties share each other's acute and chronic pain because they understood each other's concerns now. This facilitates the development of a 3rd alternative to any problems which benefits all.

The above proposed solution to any misunderstanding seems abstract and ideal, however, it pertains to each and every one of us in our daily life. More often or not, we quarrel with someone and later on we start to regret but we are not willing to take the first step forward to apologize. In the long run, the problem drags and our relationship with them starts to deteoriate severely and soon it becomes broken. So, before things get worsened, why not be more gracious and be the one to take the first step forward?